Scared Self-Starter

So Anna is officially "the Man" or "the woman" or whatever you want to call it.

She sent me a link to an internship website today that has got me excited about applying for internships again. I feel like I really have a shot at this, AND if I get the internship, I think that's one less class that I have to worry about. I can do this. I can be a self-starter and take a step in the direction of careers. I want to do this now before I graduate college. I don't want to get my degree, then be like "now what?" Not that there's anything wrong with people that do that, but I already know that my degree is probably not going to do me sh*t (pardon my French). In the field I'm interested in, the entertainment industry, it's all about who you know and getting your foot in the door. I look at people like my cousin Chelsea, who have gone this route and become successful at it, and I ask myself, "What did they do to get where they are?" The answer is that they started before everyone. Sometimes to be the best, you need to be the first one there, because when your first they can't compare you to anyone who has gone before you =P Reminds me of a famous song:

"I want to be, the very best, like no one ever was. To catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause."

I just want to do this because I'm scared about my future. I enjoy the safety of college and fear the unknown of the working world. If I could be a professional student and just learn about a multitude of subjects. I feel like I should face my fears though. This Friday, I'm facing one of my biggest fears: anesthesia. I'm going to be getting my wisdom teeth removed, and I need to be put asleep to do that. I've never been put to sleep, and quite frankly I don't think it will work. I think that I'll stay awake until they overdose me on it and I die. Luckily, I understand that I'm exaggerating, but that still does not remove the fear. So this Thursday, I face the fear of applying for internships, and on Friday, I face the fear of anesthesia. I should bring my guitar, because I'm gonna rock that sh*t. ;) Wish me luck.

Btw, I finished editing and posted my latest film project for Film Production class. It's a scene from Donnie Darko, but I'm not sure which scene as I've never seen the movie.